Evening sharing just for fun...

Bill has a new I phone so we are getting some great new pictures of our grandson on their trip to Pennsylvania last week... I just wanted to share these with you.  Note how Gus is being groomed to dresss up for big occassions.  I highly approve!  Gus sure is seeing the sights for a little 6 week old.. too bad it looks like he is sleeping through most of it.  But he will be able to look back at the pictures, and have that for his memory of his first plane ride and wedding in Pennsylvania!  That is the memory for my kids... pictures!  There are so many... that they left home with a scrapbook for every year that they have been alive!  There weren't many days go by without a few pictures taken.  Now they need a U Haul to take their photos when they leave home...

Forgiveness is lifegiving- the simplicity of the dove.

The other night some tired dirty kids were looking for their beds, at about sunset, as we were starting to get some of the mess cleaned up at our place... Grandma had her camera, and Ruth had the rake and was cleaning up the remants of the old hay shed that had blown down and was burning... the kids, dogs and I sat on the edge of the old foundation and listened to misquitoes buzz in our ears and look down at our dirty feet, and clothes.  Mary and I eventually walked back to check out the sunset across the corn field behind our farm.

Today in the morning prayer that Pat and I managed to do before he headed off on the baler with a hopeful heart to finally get some of his hay baled... much was swept away in the storm of the century!  The prayer centered on our sinfulness and how the Lord is there to forgive if we only are contrite for our faults and weaknesses...  The example to us was the prodigal son... that says it all right there!  Jesus tells us today in the Gospel - "Behold, I am sending you like sheep in the midst of wolves; so be shrewd as serpents and simple as doves."  Mt 10: 16

"I shall get up and go to my father and I shall say to himi, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you.'" Luke 15: 18-19  I read a little booklet that came in the mail from America needs Fatima last night called The Golden Key to Paradise- Perfect Contrition- and it was good to be reminded that each night we should be exmamining our consciences and asking for forgiveness in order to keep on the path of "sainthood."  As my son in law, Joseph, is famous for saying - "We are all called to be saints."  We are not given low standards as Christians, but are called to reach for the stars with the help of Christ as we follow him carrying our cross. 

"every evening do not fail to make an act of contrition along with your prayers... Do not say that the examination of conscience and perfect contrition is good for priests and perfect souls, do not say, 'I don't have time in the evening, I am too tired!'  A few minutes will suffice... After praying, think a few moments about the faults and the sins of the day and recite slowly and fervently, at the foot of the crucifix, the act of contrition.  If you should ever have the misfortune to commit a mortal sin, do not remain in that state.   Restore yourself by perfect contrition.  Restore yourself at once, or at least at your evening prayers, and without delay go to confession."  J De Driesch

Act of Contrition

"O, my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended you. I detest all my sins because of your just punishment, but most of all because they offend you, my God, who are all-good and deserving of all my love. I firmly resolve, with the help of Your grace, to sin no more and to avoid the near occasion of sin. "

From the Catechism of the Catholic Church; 1430-31

"Jesus calls to conversion and penance, like that of the prophets before Him, does not aim first at outward works,'sackcloth and ashes,' fasting and mortification, but at the CONVERSION OF THE HEART, INTERIOR CONVERSION.  Without this, such penance remain sterile and false, however, interior conversion urges expression in visible signs, gestures and works of penance.

  Interior repentance is a radical reorientation of our whole life, a return, a conversion to God with all our heart, an end of sin, a turning away from evil, with repugnance toward the evil actions we have committed.  AT the same time it entails the desire and resolution to change one's life, with hope in God's mercy and trust in the help of his grace." 

Lord God, we love you and need you and want to in every way stay close to you as we walk through this life carrying our cross and coming after you down the path that you have laid out before us.  It is narrow and hard... yet we long to be simple as doves in how we rid ourselves of those things that seperate us from you... May we soar to new heights as we leave the burdens of our sins behind each night as we go to sleep and rise to face the new day filled with your love and forgiveness.  May we take advantage of the deeper healing of your words coming to us through your priest - "Go in peace.  Your sins are forgiven."  Jesus, we trust in you!  Amen and Halleluia!

Bless-bless, Barb

"What a loss that people do not better understand its importance at this last moment of life...

Every one rushes about; they do not understand the tears and cries; they lose their heads; they go to find the doctor or the priest; they bring fresh water and all the remedies that they secretly possess.  And while the sick person is in agony, perhaps, has pity on his immortal soul; no one suggests to him an act of perfect contrition.  If you find yourself in a similar situation, hasten to the side of the dying person and, calmly and serenly presenting to him, if possible, the image of Jesus crucified, with a sure voice and firm voice, tell him to think and to repeat from the depths of his soul what you are about to say.  Then slowly and clearly recite the act of contrition even though it would appear that sick person understands and comprehends nothing.  You will have done a supremely good work... It is not necessary to speak to him about confession. Urge him to make an act of love of God and of Jesus crucified in slowly reciting to him the act of contrition."  from this booklet by J. De Driesch

I have been at many deathbeds in my years of work with hospice and have never done this... I thought that it was worth sharing if it should present itself with a close family member down the road... I have shared the familiar prayers with families and their dying family member in the last moments of life... "The Our Father" certainly is "an act of love of God" and gives comfort to all as we are praying the prayer that Jesus taught us!  Much to take to heart!  Barb

Just thought this picture of Nancy with 6 week old Gus would warm the cockles of your hearts...

LIfe is back to semi normal...

This was minutes after the storm had gone through on Friday... we were stunned to see all the water and our building down as well as many trees.  Later we also could see that the wind and hail had raised heck with our bean crop too.  Our house made it through as did all of us, so how could we be anything but grateful for that?  Well, struggling with power and then no internet to reach out to others or get in touch.... it just made it all seem hard and challanging... plus the now huge job of cleaning up after it all! 

Such a challanging year it has been and it makes you wonder what is going to hit next...The day before the storm, we had bought tickets to go to France for a week to be there when Hallel takes her first vows in the Community of the Lamb on July 24th.  It seemed like it would be impossible for us to think about doing that, but slowly we are getting things somewhat back to normal and the work is getting done, and we are heading towards that goal.  Come hell of high water as they say.... we are going to France!  That will be Pat, John and I will be going and many prayers will be part of getting us there!

But anything we do in life should be surrounded and supported by prayer!  I read a wonderful meditation last night about a form of praying over scripture called Lectio divina... it is kind of how the Community of the Lamb "chews" the Gospel every day.  It is the "prayerful reading of Sacred Scripture."  And it is something that Pope Benedict XVI is very excited about and really wants us to start doing it in our lives and our churches..."Assiduous reading of Sacred Scripture accompanied by prayer makes the ultimate dialogue possible in which, through reading, one hears God speaking, and through prayer, one responds with a confident opening of the heart.  If this practice is promoted with efficacy, I am convinced that it will produce a new spiritual springtime in the Church."  Pope Benedict XVI

I love that feeling of excitement when I go to read the Gospel the night before and asking the Lord to speak to me!  It is wonderful to sit here and ponder his words to me and to all as I write to you!  I hope and pray that my joy and excitement makes all of those that join me here wanting to come to Him in His amazing Word!  It is how HE is here in this world with us - in His Word and His Sacraments!

Jesus, thank you for reaching out to us in your amazing Word!  WE yearn to communicate with you and our prayerful reading and listening and anwering in our prayer gives us a REAL way to share with you!  Today you tell us in Matt 10: 7-15..."The Kingdom of heaven it at hand.  Cure the sick, raise the dead, cleanse the lepers, drive out demons.  Without cost you have received; without cost you are to give..."  Lord, give us the strength and the faith to make it so, and to always trust in you to be in control of our lives.  Jesus, we trust in you!  Amen and Halleluia!

Bless-bless, Barb

"Like the deer that yearns

for running streams,

so my soul is yearning

for you, my God.

My soul is thirsting for God,

the God of my life;

when can I enter and see

the face of God?

My tears have become my bread,

by night, by day,

as I hear it said all the day long:

"Where is your God?"

Deep is calling on deep,

in the roar of the waters:

your torrents and all your waves

swept over me.

By day the Lord will send

his loving kindness;

by night I will sing to him,

praise the God of my life.

I will say to God, my rock:

"Why have you forgotten me?

Why do I go mourning

oppressed by the foe?"

Why are you cast down, my soul,

why groan within me?

Hope in God; I will praise him still,

 my savior and my God." 

Pslam 42 - used in morning prayer today

see http://www.magnificat.com/

After the storm...

The pictures of the storm cannot be added at this time, due to the situation with our computer.  We now have power after 3 days without.  We still don't have internet, and that is a definite hardship for me.  We are reeling with all the cleanup and yet are grateful that we are all safe and our home is fine.

This pretty much shows how I feel in picture form... i feel down and overwhelmed by all that I need to do and how I am feeling with a possible sinus infection.  A headache that has lingered for a week is getting to me too.

Lord... I need you and turn to you when I feel overwhelmed and weak.  That is the good part of having challenges in our lives... it makes us turn to you!  Jesus, we trust in you!  Amen and Halleluia! 

Bless-bless, Barb

Knocked out by the storm...

This very hot and steamy day on Friday led up to a horrific storm.  We were all sleeping - I had to work the night at the nursing home that night, and out of the darkness my son, John, stuck his head in my room and told me that they were heading down the basement.  The three grandkids, my son, and husband and I gathered on the floor of the basement and heard the sounds of wind and hail and rain...

It was very bad to see the damage... I had to pick up my Mary statue - her head has been knocked off as she was thrown off her platform as was the top of the old pine tree that forms our Mary Garden.  We lost at least 6 trees that were pulled up by the roots or knocked over.  Our hay shed was gone... strewn across the pasture, the 3 bales that had been inside were now without a building to cover it.  Every building site seems to have lost many trees and damage to buildings.  It is now 48 hours later and we do not have power, except for a generator that we can turn on for periods of time.  I am at my mother-in-laws writing this as we will not probably have internet for a week or more. 

The field that Mary and I had walked through in the morning was now bent over and beat down... it could recover, but it is sad to realize that our son-in-law's bean field closer to Marshall will be a total loss.  That is a hard blow for someone, who is trying to get a start in farming.  Now the clean up will be huge for us over the next weeks... before we get on our plane to head to France.  It has been a year of all years!

We are all safe and that is what matters, but it can be overwhelming to see the solid branches and trees down and know how much work it will take to get things cleaned up and somewhat back to normal. 

Today is the anniversary of my sister, Mary's death.  She died of lymphoma cancer 25 years ago today.  She was 28, and had been hugely involved in my life here on the farm!  She had come and cared for me and Ruth while I was pregnant with Nancy and on bedrest.  She had fallen in love with the farm and then found her farmer a few years later...

She was a Godmother to Nancy and Susan, and I know that she is praying for them and looking out for them from Heaven as she is the daughter she left behind, Audrey, who will be 27 this September.  Although it happened 25 years ago... that just doesn't seem to get knocked out of your memories no matter how long or how distant...

Mary on Audrey's baptism day... Jesus, we trust in you!  Only you know why, and Mary is now in a safe and happy place and we are still connected...

I promised myself that I would never put this family picture on my blog because of the skin involved, but in honor of Mary and the day that this is... I am throwing caution to the wind and putting it on here.  This was the first official picture of our extended family when we added the 4 adopted kids in 1968 when their parents had been killed in a car accident... we are in Michigan and that was a place where Mary and I really bonded as we would walk arm in arm down the beach each day... looking for fossils and just spending some close time together.  She fit under my arm and I would drape my arm around her shoulder and we would walk that way for a while and share with each other as very close and loving sisters.  Later when she was free to come to the farm and help me out as I was on bedrest... we once again connected and the closeness grew very much.  Her loss was a huge hole in my life!  Today I love her and miss her and look forward to the day that we will be reunited in heaven!

So dear Mary... I honor your memory and continue to pray for your eternal happiness in heaven with our loving Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ!  Mary certainly faced a lot of suffering at the end of her days... to the point that we were hugely relieved that she was freed from the hard way that she had to leave this world..."Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for yourselves.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."  The Gospel for today - Mt 11: 25-30 

Mary was always a hard worker and willing to pitch in.  I pray for her energy in facing the monumental job that this clean up will take... I have also been reminded very strongly that I am a far way from humble and so I will end this in prayer for a willing and contrite spirit that can rise to the occassion and accept the hardships and the unending work that it will take to come back from this "storm of life."  Jesus, I need you to help me get past the selfishness that is dragging me into self pity and sluggishness.  Give me the abililty to put others ahead of myself.  Jesus, we trust in you.  Amen and Halleluia!

Bless-bless, Barb the humble and fervent... want to be

Steamy hot - Sacred Heart

I walked outside with my camera and the lens fogged up due to the heat and humidity...I thought that the picture portrayed visually the actual way that we felt walking out and having the heat hit us this morning.  The poor dogs might have the entire swimming pool emptied... trying to keep cool. 

Little Dave looks to be considering a swan dive into the coolness of the pool...Today is the feast of the Sacred Heart of Jesus... how often I think of some of the saints that experienced the Heart burning with love for us... "O Jesus, loveliest of all beauty, wash me more and more from my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin, that, purified by Thee, I may approach to Thee, the pure One, and may be worthy to dwell in "Thy Heart all the days of my life, that I may both see and do Thy will. For this cause was Thy side pierced, that an entrance might be opened for us. Who is there who would not love this wounded Heart? Who would not return love for love to Him that hath loved so well? Amen. "

Litany of the Twelve Promises


Heart of Jesus; burning with love for us:

R. Inflame our hearts with love of Thee.
O Heart of Jesus, behold us prostrate before Thee, to adore Thee, to praise Thee, to thank Thee, to make reparation for our past faults, and to consecrate ourselves to Thy love.
Bearing in mind Thy magnificent Promises to those who honor and love Thy Sacred Heart, we say to Thee with the utmost confidence:
Heart of Jesus, give us all the graces necessary for our state in life. Thou hast promised it, O Jesus. *
Heart of Jesus, grant peace to our families. *
Heart of Jesus, console us in all our sorrows. *
Heart of Jesus, be our safe Refuge during life, and above all at the hour of our death. *
Heart of Jesus, pour abundant blessings on all our labors. *
Heart of Jesus, be for sinners the Source and Infinite Ocean of Mercy. *
Heart of Jesus, make indifferent souls fervent. *
Heart of Jesus, make fervent souls advance rapidly to perfection. *
Heart of Jesus, bless the houses where Thine image is exposed and honored. *
Heart of Jesus, give to priests the power of touching the most hardened hearts. *
Heart of Jesus, engrave on Thy Heart forever the names of those who propagate this devotion. *
Heart of Jesus, give those who receive Holy Communion nine consecutive First Fridays, the grace of final repentance, that they may not die under Thy displeasure, but, strengthened by the reception of the Sacraments, may Thy Heart be their secure refuge at their last hour. *
O sweetest Heart of Jesus, I implore:

R. That I may ever love Thee more and more.

Lord Jesus, remember the promises which, in the infinite mercy of Thy Divine Heart, Thou didst make to Saint Margaret Mary. Be the Protector of our life, the Strength of our weakness, the Repairer of our faults, the Completion of our virtues, our Refuge at the hour of death. Amen.

O God, Who hast prepared for those who love Thee such good things as pass man's understanding: pour into our hearts such love toward Thee, that, loving Thee in and above all things, we may obtain Thy promises, which exceed all that we can desire. Through Jesus Christ Our Lord. Amen.

Jesus, your Heart is LOVE beyond our understanding... to unconditionally forgive and love is so hard for us to fathom, yet again and again we come to know that we are nothing without YOU!  Give us a meek and humble heart so that we can accept and grow into a beautiful being of light and life and love.  Jesus, we trust in you!  Amen and Halleluia!

Bless-bless, Barb the humble and fervent

Memorare to the Sacred Heart

Remember, O most sweet Jesus, that no one who has had recourse to Thy Sacred Heart, implored its help, or sought its mercy was ever abandoned. Encouraged with confidence, O tenderest of hearts, we present ourselves before Thee, crushed beneath the weight of our sins. In our misery, O Sacred Heart of Jesus, despise not our simple prayers, but mercifully grant our requests.


Homily of St. Bonaventure


That the Church might be formed from the side of Christ as He slept on the cross, and the Scripture be fulfilled which says: They shall look on Him whom they pierced; it was permitted by divine ordinance that one of the soldiers should pierce that sacred side, opening it with a lance, in so far as, when the blood and water gushed forth, the price of our salvation might be poured out, as if issuing from the hidden fountain, as it were, of the Heart, and might give power to the sacraments of the Church to bestow the life of grace, and, moreover, might be as a saving drink of living waters, bubbling up to life eternal, for those who were already living in Christ. Arise, then, O soul beloved of Christ, do not stop your watching, place thy lips there, and drink the waters from the saving fountains.

Since for a single time we have found our way to that most sweet Heart of the Lord Jesus, and it is good for us to be here, let us not easily be torn away from it. O how good and pleasant it is, to dwell in this Heart. Thy Heart, O most dear Jesus, is the good treasure, the pearl of great price, which we find by digging in the field of Thy body. Who would cast aside this pearl? Yes, rather I will give all my pearls, I will exchange for it all my thoughts and affections and I will purchase It for myself, turning all my thoughts to the Heart of the good Jesus, and without fail It will support me. Therefore, O most sweet Jesus, finding this Heart that is Thine and mine, I will pray to Thee, my God: admit my prayers into the shrine of hearkening: and even more draw me altogether into Thy Heart.

For to this end was Thy side pierced, that an entry might be open to us. To this end was Thy Heart wounded, that in it we might be able to dwell secure from alarms from without. And it was wounded none the less on this account that, through the visible wound, we might see the invisible wound of love. How could this ardor be better shown, than by His allowing, not only His body, but even His very Heart itself, to be wounded by a lance? And so, the wound in His flesh shows forth the wound in His spirit. Who does not love that Heart, so deeply wounded? Who would not return love for love to One so greatly loving? Who would not embrace One so pure? And so still abiding in the flesh, let us, in so far as we are able, return love for love to That which loves us, embrace our wounded One, Whose hands and feet, side and Heart, have been pierced by wicked husbandmen; and let us pray that He may deign to bind our hearts, still hard and impenitent, with the chain of His love, and wound them with the dart thereof.