The Pat and Barb Verly family and their 5 children, in laws and grandkids along with many prayer warriors have been drawn together by John's cancer... sharing daily for 8 months started this blog- Family Soul Story - Our faith, family, farm and now our cancer journey called HEALING have colored and deepened our world. WE continue to share and depend on the support of our prayer warrior community, that has lowered us into the Lord's presence for His healing!
Deacon Robert Cross - my dad on hospice in our Farm Monastery for 6 months - 4/16/20 thru 10/23/20
My dad smiling in Veterans Hospital after having a stint put in his kidney a month after mom had passed in a day after falling in their Assisted Living - the Lodge of New Hope. Covid had made seeing my dad in his home where he was now alone impossible. There are stories of some of my siblings talking to him through a window outside.
He was now unable to return to his home at the Lodge and so within a day I had him in my car and he came to live with me on the farm. His prophetic words from 20+ years ago - "Barb, if anything happens to your mother, I will come and live with you." came to be! I have Covid to thank for shutting the doors everywhere else so that this was the best answer for both of us.
Dad going to get some clothes and cosmetics for the final time on April 14th. It was a sad hard day for the staff.
Going into his home since October 5th of 2019 - we had done a tag team through August and September where I and 3 of my siblings took turns being with mom and dad while we figured out the next step for them. Mom had increasing dementia and dad had some procedures done - they needed help with meals and cares. I had the middle of the week, and loved my time with them and traveling in my "chapel on wheels" coming and going.
Mom and dad were comfortable for the 5 months they lived in their new place in the Lodge of New Hope. Mom had a hard time leaving their home of 11 years in St Croix Falls, but dad knew that it was time to move on where they would be safer and get more help that they were needing especially with meals. Mom stopped making meals for them with her dementia.
The day dad came to live with me - he was admitted to hospice! The same Prairie Home Hospice where I had worked as a RN for 15 years! I have always loved hospice, and to share that with my dad was the best! He was very pleased with how he was treated royally with a hair cut every month by his nurse, who had been a hairdresser before she became a nurse! He also had his nails done by his LPN as needed. On top of that anytime we had a problem to deal with - there was no delay to find an answer. In pain? Dr Skrien came to our home and within a day he was using a pain patch!
Why do I love hospice people ask me how I can work with people that are dying. I do not fear death, and in a way I long for being out of this world and united with my Lord and Lady. Death is a part of all of our lives, too. I see the beauty of facing death in how it takes all the superficial out of the way. Stuff and material things of this world just don't matter anymore. It comes down to Faith and Family. Hospice allows the patient and his family to find peace as he walks into the sunset of his life.
Dad walking around the circle we have in our home. The new bedroom Ruth and Paul added to our home with the bathroom right off of it was perfect for my dad to have his own TV, space and could get away from the huge family that we have here a lot.
Dad in his room - his lift chair came a bit later from his Assisted living.
Brother Jim from Glencoe and his family came to see dad in the first week!
It was such a huge gift to have my dad here on the farm with me! If we had put him in a nursing home with strangers up in the Cities - no one would be able to visit with him due to the Covid close down of the world. This way family could come and see him face to face!
My father is a Permanent Deacon in The Catholic Church - he celebrated his 44th year anniversary while he was with me! As a Permanent Deacon dad is asked to pray Morning and Evening Prayer of The Church each day, so the first day here - we began praying together Morning Prayer after breakfast and Evening Prayer after his supper. My greatest JOY was being able to share in his religious LIFE!
Spring was here when he arrived and he was here for an entire growing season on the farm. We would sit together out on my wonderful porch and pray The Rosary and Divine Chaplet of Mercy each day at the 3p hour - which is set aside as a special time to pray as that was the time Jesus died on the Cross! Dad was able to see the crop planted, grow, and harvested and even the first snow before he passed on October 23rd, 2020!
Reading in his room - my dad was sharp right up to the end! He prayed for his entire family of 140+ every Monday - first and middle names! We all loved to have the knowledge that we were being covered in prayer by our wonderful dad and grandpa and great-grandpa!
I will add a page here that I wrote years ago about our conversion to Catholic from Protestant. Not only that but dad was a Protestant Minister all my growing up years! I am the oldest of 11 children - 13 of us took our First Communion at the Cenacle Convent 52 years ago at Christmas Midnight mass! It is a truly amazing story and I love to shout it from the rooftops!
The 13 at our "Farm" - a hobby farm in Miltown, WI that we made livable in 1971 - new Catholics. This began my "romance years" of loving All things Catholic! I have never stopped loving ALL that the Church gives to me - to assist me as I stagger down the narrow path dragging my Most Cherished Cross! My parents and I shared this deep LOVE for Jesus, Mary, and The Church!
Our wedding day in Basilica of St Mary in Minneapolis - August 3.1978
I have given Patrick Verly- My Most Cherished Cross credit for our conversion. He told his sisters years before that he would only marry a Catholic. He is so determined that I now see that his prayers helped us along!
I am sharing the page I wrote about our marriage stories - "The world needs lights!" Open to LIFE and raising LIGHTS now onto the next generation!
Mom and dad on their 50 wedding anniversary - they made it to 70 years and mom turned 90, which was a huge turning point for her!
An added story about our huge family - my parents prompted by the Holy Spirit to adopt 4 siblings, whose parents were killed in an auto accident! This was taken shortly after in our beloved Michigan! We spent our summers there at my grandparents cabin. In order to get the kids out of the city for the summers - Flint, MI was where I graduated HS!
Still no leaves on the trees in April!
Praying our rosary and chaplet in the first week and we did not miss a day! Such a powerful time for us. One time we prayed for my sister, Marty, and she shared that she had a heart attack at that exact time and had come through it with no heart damage! "Thank you for your prayers dad!"
Masks from a family member - dad is a twins fan as it Pat and John.
Dad loved hospice and felt very spoiled and pampered by the nurses and aides.
"my feet are cared for like never before!" Dad with a huge smile!
Dad with his statues gifted to him for being a Deaon at Manistique, MI Catholic Church for years.
In May we welcomed John's daughter, Birdie Barbara! Dad was very interested in watching her grow as the months passed by.
She really reminds me of my Verly girls - dark hair and complexion. A true Verly girl! And my first namesake - Birdie Barbara!
It was such a blessing to have my dad get to know the local grandkids on a daily basis. Our Sunday brunch was something that dad really looked forward to! This Sunday it was on my porch - Ascension Sunday May 24th!
The farm family - they have now added Thomas Robert, who is named after my father.
A few Sundays dad would go along to mass including Birdie Barbara's Baptism! A lot of Sunday's Pat or John would bring him Eucharist after he watched mass on TV. Dad was anointed twice including Reconciliation and Eucharist.
Dad with our grandkids only missing Maria's on Pentecost Sunday/Birdie's Baptism Day - May 31st, 2020
The best - a smile on her day of entering The Church! My dad as a Permanent Deacon baptized all my children! To have him to share this beautiful occasion was a perfect GIFT from above!
3 of our 5 with their grandpa, Deacon Robert Cross, who baptized them into The Church! He also brought me into The Church 52 years ago with our entire family of 13! Each day since has been a pearl of great price!
Dad and Birdie keeping their distance - a covid joke!
Dad knew about our wonderful brunch shared on the farm after mass and it happened that we gathered after mass on the Trinity Mass on June 7th! Dad got to tour the farm and he held one month old Birdie Barbara! Every Sunday dad would like to have a doughnut!
My dad and the 2 Barbaras on Ruth's beautiful porch on the farm in June!
David broke his arm while fencing. Dad at mass with us - David had even served and rung the bells at the consecration!
A very special image shared by my sister, Paula, of her granddaughter, Raegan praying by mom. Dad really appreciated this! We were unable to have Mom's funeral mass due to covid, but a few months later we made it happen!!!
Dad was so pleased to manage to honor mother with a mass! Some tears in his eyes as my sister sang, Ave Maria!
Dad with his kids - missing 3 so that was pretty good considering that the covid scare was still a thing!
Dad and I - I am eternally grateful that we had this time to share together! I know it seemed impossible for him to leave the doctors he had at Veteran's Hospital, but we went to Veterans in Sioux Falls a couple times while he was here for some procedures, and figured it out after all. As I say - I have covid to thank for my dad coming here for his final 6 months!
My porch was especially beautiful the summer dad was here. We celebrated new granddaughter, Birdie Barbara's Baptism on my porch with dad. Ruth's flowers were a gift all summer! Also the flag on the flag pole showed us the wind through the spring, summer and fall!
The end of July my brother, Jim and his wife stayed with dad so that Pat and I could go for some time with Hallel and The Community of the Lamb in Kansas City!
Hallel holding Birdie - almost 3 months old.
We had a huge surprise! They allowed us to bring her home for her home visit! She had not seen my dad for 12 years since she had left for France in 2008!
So much JOY that my nun could share with her Deacon grandfather - we prayed together and dad loved to hear her sing the Angelus and Salve Regina!
Salve Regina as Hallel sings it at night prayer each night. Angels singing!
Mary's first goats - she was on the road to becoming a goat farmer.
We had good rains that summer and a beautiful bean and corn crop! Out standing in her field
Dad got a bit put out with me, but I went extra crazy with pictures knowing that his time was coming to an end! Hallel needed to head back to Kansas, so this was their final goodbye in this world. Quite emotional for me at least. Hallel is quite calm about it all. It must be because she lives her life in the Spiritual Realm a lot!
This is on my family wall now, and I have no plans to take it down anytime soon! LOVE!
Dad wanted a single rose for mom on what would have been their 71st birthday on August 30th here on the farm. They were blessed with being together for their monumental 70th Anniversary the year before. Still in their home in St Croix Falls together. They moved into New Hope a month later.
A big group hug for mom and dad on their 71st!
Mom and dad on their 70th in their home. Mom hated to leave it, but we had to get them somewhere safe, and where their meals were provided. Coming here just didn't seem to be right then, but I do have some regrets that I couldn't have the two of them here at the end! Not to be, Barb.
Nancy and Bill won a huge contest put on by Our Sunday Visitor - innovators in Evangelizing the Faith! Dad was so happy for them!
Dad and I at Vets in Sioux Falls for stint change. He started bleeding and slowly got weaker but still sharp in the mind!
Patrick's First Communion in Fort Lewis, WA that same year.
Augustine had his spur of the moment just as all was shutting down in Delano! Despite the world pandemic 3 of our grandchildren had their First Communion in 2020! Thank you, Lord and Lady!
Dad with me for my 69th birthday - October 6, 2020. Thanks Dad for giving me LIFE! Dad looks worn out - he only lived till October 23rd. He was ready to go to meet his maker!
He was able to watch the harvest from the porch and from the van as we drove around. He was impressed that 12 year old David was raking ahead of his dad baling the corn stalks.
Dad getting anointed by Fr Denny 11 days before the end. Good to have Reconciliation and be ready for the end here in this world.
Dad gave us a warning that he was close to the end - he passed out getting ready for mass on Sunday. My bother, Al and wife with their 4 grandkids came to see dad a last time!
Dad sure loved to have family come to see him here.
My sister, Cher, and her son/my Godson, David, came just 4 days before dad passed peacefully in the same bed that he and mother had as newly weds!
The next day the hospital bed arrived just as my sister, Paula, who is an RN also and her family came to surround dad with their loving farewells! LOVE this keepsake! They used it on their Christmas card that year, and there is nothing better!
Praying with dad in his hospital bed 3 days before he passed from this world! Praying and sharp till the end!
He wasn't impressed that he got to see his first snow... October 20th!
Dad served as a Permanent Deacon/Administrator at the Catholic Church in Colman, SD from 1997-1999 - just 90 miles from my door to theirs!
Dad loved our homemade tomato soup! He ate it for lunch and supper for the last week. He also loved a small bowl of our applesauce for dessert. He was why we do the work that summer!
Dad with my brother, Dan, with whom he shared his birthday. In 2020 dad was 95 and Dan was 59!
The morning of the 23rd - I could hear that dad's breathing was getting quiet and less - Pat and I stayed with him praying and telling him how much we love him, and telling him that it was Ok to go. In a few minutes he was peacefully gone. His prayer book is now mine and he marked it well for me! The rosary is with him in the coffin. Family Soul Story - Choose Life!: 30th Sunday of Ordinary time... Be the LOVE of Christ to all those around me
My youngest sister, Carol, just missed seeing dad before he passed . She stayed with me for a few days and helped go through dad's things and just kept me company. A special time - in dad's robe!
The pictures from his time here on hospice on the farm!
Dad did it! He got all of his kids together around him! I was amazed and very happy to know how much our father was loved by all!
Old friend Fr Custodio, who gave us instruction when we entered The Church 52 years ago - concelebrated for my dad! Such a blessing!
I need to end this - I have been wanting to add a page devoted to this most wonderful gift of sharing in my dad's religious life as he went down the narrow path to heaven forever with mom and Jesus and Mary and all the Angels and Saints! Jesus, we trust in you. Bless-bless, Barb
Patrick's First Communion in Fort Lewis, WA that same year.
Augustine had his spur of the moment just as all was shutting down in Delano! Despite the world pandemic 3 of our grandchildren had their First Communion in 2020! Thank you, Lord and Lady! 
He wasn't impressed that he got to see his first snow... October 20th! 
Dad served as a Permanent Deacon/Administrator at the Catholic Church in Colman, SD from 1997-1999 - just 90 miles from my door to theirs! 
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