Happy Memorial weekend one and all. I don't know about you, but it kind of got here without me realizing that it was this weekend. Working at the NH this weekend... I thought I would stop and quickly put something on the grave of my two 5 month boys... I love to remember all my lost little angels so I found a way to write all their names and the year they died...
I call my losses "the boys" because I thought I couldn't carry boys after 4 girls in a row and the two of the losses were boys that I lost at 5 months each - William and Robert! I was so hoping that the Lord would allow me to have one more after John so I wouldn't get the comments that I quit after I got my boy. I was thinking girl on the last one in 1994, so when I lost her I chose to name her Mary... I really only know that the two after John were boys, so arriving in Heaven and meeting my 7 little ones will be a great JOY and completion of my family - I will then have the 12 children that I told my doctor I would have when I went in for my first. He said that he will never forget me saying I would have 12 kids, and he was the local planned parenthood doctor in town! Pat would ask me often if I should change doctors - "No, he needs to know that there are people like us."
The cemetery was quiet and beautifully peaceful when I was there around 5p or so. It allows me to remember in a special way all my babies, and it is comforting for me. Of course, I no longer mourn them on a daily basis although I do pray for them weekly at least. When I do the litany of family they always complete mine! Jesus, we trust in YOU. Bless-bless, Barb
No comments:
Post a Comment