"God loves us and cradles us."

I am overjoyed to be able to share some of the pictures of precious grandson, David, for the time that I watched him.. up until John got cancer and then all changed...

The quote that I used for my title today is from the Catholic Youth Bible and is directly tied to Psalm 131..."A humble prayer of childlike trust.  It gives the wonderful image of God holding us like a child in a mother's lap."

Psalm 131

Song of quiet trust

O Lord, my heart is not lifted up,

my eyes are not raised too high:

I do not occupy myself with things

too great and too marvelous for me.

But I have calmed and quieted my soul.

like a weaned child with its mother;

my soul is like the weaned child that is with me.

O Israel, hope in the Lord

from this time and forevermore.

"God hugs us close, and keeps us safe and warm and protected.  We don't need to solve problems or be concerned about our performance.  We are loved just because we are us.  God created us; God loves us and cradles us."  Catholic Youth Bible

"Do you remember sittting quietly on your mother's lap when you were a small child... telling you stories or singing to you?  In prayer, imagine being held by God, as a child is held by a mother.  You might be surprised how safe and secure you feel!" 

Some of my fondest memories with my own kids is sitting on the couch after baths with them all gathered around on every side of me and we are sharing a book!  Now that is as cozy as it gets for me... how I loved my "nest years" with all my sweet little chicks around me!

I have to share this now... I can't wait any longer!  Today is the feast day of St Teresa of Jesus... She is one of those amazing saints that took Christ for their spouce, and never was out of his presence with constant prayer lifted to him even in the midst of establishing convents... She is described in morning prayer this morning as a wonderful combination of both Martha...doing all the work, and her sister Mary,who sat at the Lord's feet and listened with loving ears, heart and mind and soul!  Wow!  I want to be like that... I have the listening down good, but the work part is my downfall! 

Anyways, I hooted when I read... in my children's saint book that we used with the kids here at home over those wonderful "nest years"... I had to scan it so that all could see... She is the patron saint of headaches!  In case you missed my last two entries... our son John, who has been going through the journey of brain cancer over the last 15 months called me from college yesterday to tell me, with some concern, that he had "the worst headache in my eyes that I have ever had."  I immediately asked for prayers and tried to nurse him over the phone... Then a friend told me that there is a flu going around that has a headache for its main symptom!  We were hugely relieved!  I now cannot wait to tell John that he is in good hands with St Teresa to pray to today... for her intercession... after all she was crippled as a young girl and prayed to St Joseph and was healed, so her prayers are power and might!  St Teresa please intercede for John and all those that are suffering today...especially with those headaches that are so debilitating... I am also lifting up a certain "daughter" of mine that shared that her migrains are extemely painful for her.... it puts her life on hold!

This idea today of finding comfort in our mother's arms and how that is the feeling we get when we allow ourselves to be held and loved for who we are by our God... I would say that a lot of times I feel that with Our Lady.. to me she is the epitome of all the beauty of a mother and her tender love for me!  One thing that I have also noticed with my kids is that they love to walk around in mom's and dad's shoes!  I see it too with the grandkids that I have watched over the years and pobably with that even more I feel that it is a direct symbol to them of how much they honor and look up to this parent of grandparent...

I have seen it with the little boys, and how they idolize their farmer grandpa and it is like putting on his shoes they are "stepping into his shoes" and showing that they want to be like him... it is a precious thing to see!  And I think very symbolic of a deep love for this big strong man that drives tractors!

Little kids in big shoes - much more to me than a cute as ever picture!  It is a sign of what we are talking about today... how that deep love for those we look up to  - God in our lives - can translate into wanting to be like them and to follow in their footsteps!  That love we feel from God... no matter what we have done or where we find ourselves.. makes us want to love in return and to "pray without ceasing." (I Thes 5:17)  

"I was always in your presence;

you were holding me by my right hand.

You will guide me by your counsel

and so you will lead me to glory." Psalm 73

"What else have I in heaven but you?

Apart from you I want nothing on earth.

My body and my heart faint for joy;

God is my possession for ever."  Ps 73

"To be near God is my happiness.

I have made the Lord God my refuge.

I will tell of all your works

at the gates of the city of Zion."  Psalm 73

Wow!  That David.. he sure knew how to praise God and I feel that he felt the same love for God that you and I feel as we are forgiven and loved by our amazing God, who created the world and the entire universe!

There is a quote that I just have to share here!  It is by ST John of the Cross and just tells in such fun terms how he experiences this love of God for him! 

"You considered that one hair fluttering on my neck;  You gazed at it upon my neck and it captivated You."  How absolutely special is that?  It goes so well with the Gospel for today from Luke 12:1-7

"Are not 5 sparrows sold for two small coins?  Yet not one of them has escaped the notice of God.  Even the hairs of your head are all counted.  Do not be afraid.  You are worth more than many sparrows." 

When they say that God is a mystery... I think that it is a way of saying... How can He love me and everything about me that much and at the same time be loving all the hundreds and thousands of millions people in the entire world at the same time as me and all that makes up this world down to every creature?... I think that we can start to blow our minds realizing the infinite love that there is for us!  For Him to count every hair on our heads and to look in facination of one "fluttering on our necks"... He is totally in love with me and you!... that is love beyond measure, and personally I am totally changed and uplifted by the knowledge of that LOVE!

I have been sharing, with the permission of the parents, about Kelsey.  She has thankfully suddenly returned home, after 2 months of being gone!  There is much healing to take place, and her mother was writing me about how the two of them had taught 3rd grade religion last year and how they worked with them in preparation for their first reconcilliation:

"Her father and I have told her how we have grown closer to God through this last couple months, and want to see her receive the same grace. She helped me teach 3rd grade religion class last year and we prepared the children for their first confession. She has not been too far away from this sacrement. I remember telling the children that this sacrament is like getting a hug from your parents after you have done something wrong. Your parents have forgiven you because you have asked for it, but you also get to sit in their lap and feel their hugs and love. I want her to remember that but at this point do not want to push too much. "

I thought that this was a beautiful thing to share and shows how much they believe and know that true healing can occur for Kelsey through all that the Catholic Church has for us in the sacraments!  All these counselors and medication that people try to cure their hurts and emotional pain... come to Him in His Church and His sacraments!  There were many "helps"offered to us over our journey with John's cancer, but we wanted to do it with the Church!  There is so much life and healing to be found there in the daily prayers we shared morning and evening, all the saints there to help and intercede for us and to model for us that we can overcome all hardships with our God and His Church at our side!

John had frequently used reconcilliation on his journey and asked to have Eucharist to be brought to him daily, when he was hospitalized the numerous times over those months!  He also was annionted 4 times along with prayer for healing during mass on one Sunday with a relic of a man known to have a ministry of healing in our lifetime in Wisconsin... a humble man that answered the door at the monastery where he lived, but people flocked to him for healing!

His reputation for sanctity, the gift of healing, and the ability to read souls had preceded his arrival, so, once again, he was given the porter’s post, and the crowds would line up after Mass to open their hearts to him and receive his blessing and advice. The humble porter’s apostolate was a cherished blessing to the monastery but it was also a trial, a welcome one, but still a bit burdensome. You see, a good number of the visitors needed to have their confessions heard and the humble doorkeeper had no faculties to forgive sins. Father Casey would spend almost his whole day with his needy children and the confession bell was rung frequently... http://catholicism.org/venerable-solanus-casey-ofm-cap.html

It was such a powerful experience for the packed church that morning almost a year ago... November... just after we had gotten devastating news that the cancer was coming back and growing through the new chemo they had started him on... then a week of prayer!  The first week of Dec last year... all 168 hours of every hour - 7 days... 24 hours a day... was filled with at least one but usually 2,3,or 4 people praying! That is so many prayers! We heard from many, who shared their experiences whether early in the morning, or in the middle of the night!  WE had a scan just at the end of that week and the prayers to Venerable Solanus and John's cancer was virtually gone and the next scan it was totally gone and has been for 10 months now!  A miracle, and John gives all the credit to prayer over all the procedures that he has recieved at the hands of the doctors!  Jesus is in total control - of that we have no doubt!

So much today!  We are all forever changed by the last year and as I was reminded on my way home from the nursing home yesterday morning.. we need to hold onto that closeness that we experienced over this last journey where our difficulties brought us so close to God!  So often I am reminded of the idea of the Good Shepherd carrying the helpless lost lamb and gathering it into his loving arms too protect it from the prowling and hungry wolf!

I need to end this and I think that you see that it is so close to my heart and I could go on and on!  How I love to be able to share here each day and to tell the world how wonderful is our God and His Son and His Bride the Church!  As one that chose to become a Catholic along with my entire family... I cherish all that there is for me to learn and grow in my faith!  I can never accomplish all of it, but to me that is thrilling and a most amazing adventure that never ends! 

Dear St Teresa, who spent all her spare time at the feet of her Lord in prayer...  writes these powerful words:

"They who really love you, my God, walk safely on a broad and royal road.  They are far from the precipice.  Hardly have they begun to stumble when you,Lord, give them your hand.  One fall is not sufficient for a person to be lost, nor are many, if they love you and not the things of the world. They journey in the valley of humility."

John just called and said that when he got up at 8a that his headache was gone!  I told him about St Teresa and he said; "Thank you St Teresa for healing me of my headache."  Then he told me that he his exema( a skin condition that not even his stem cell transplant got rid of... just a part of John from infancy to today)  was in the shape of a cross on his forehead this morning!  That is so funny and a sure sign to the two of us that the Lord is in control, and the prayers of others continues to protect us and give us peace and a wonderful laugh of joy now and then!  Thank you Jesus and the spiritual army surrounding us!

Dear Lord, we are filled with great joy in your presence ,along with your Beloved Mother, and all your super saints... Our cup overflows!  Allow us to carry you forth with us and not falter if we make our human mistakes... keep on going filled with the humility we need for you to use us!  Allow us to embrace that smallness and to rejoice in it!  Jesus, we trust in you!  Amen and Halleluia!

Bless-bless, Barb

"Let nothing trouble you, let nothing make you afraid.  All things pass away.  God never changes. Patience obtains everything.  God alone is enough."  St Teresa of Jesus pray for us!